8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty: Download the Bestselling Book Now
- giovalfiltpronin
- Aug 2, 2023
- 9 min read
8 Rules of Love: How to Find It, Keep It, and Let It Go
Love is one of the most powerful and profound emotions that we can experience. It can make us happy, fulfilled, and inspired. It can also make us hurt, confused, and frustrated. But what is love exactly? And how can we find it, keep it, and let it go when necessary?
In this article, we will explore the 8 rules of love that can help you navigate every stage of romance, from finding your soulmate to breaking up and moving on. These rules are based on ancient wisdom and modern science, as well as the personal experiences of Jay Shetty, the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Think Like a Monk. By following these rules, you will be able to practice and nurture love better than ever before.
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Rule 1: Love yourself first
The first rule of love is to love yourself first. This means accepting yourself as you are, with your strengths and weaknesses, your flaws and virtues. It also means taking care of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. When you love yourself first, you create a solid foundation for any relationship. You also attract people who respect and appreciate you for who you are.
How can you cultivate self-love and self-compassion? Here are some tips:
Practice gratitude for what you have and who you are.
Affirm yourself with positive statements and affirmations.
Treat yourself with kindness and forgiveness.
Do things that make you happy and fulfilled.
Set healthy boundaries and say no when needed.
Seek help and support when you need it.
Rule 2: Love others as you love yourself
The second rule of love is to love others as you love yourself. This means treating others with the same respect, kindness, and compassion that you would want for yourself. It also means empathizing with their feelings, understanding their perspectives, and supporting their goals. When you love others as you love yourself, you create a strong bond with your partner. You also enrich your life with meaningful connections.
How can you practice empathy and kindness in your relationships? Here are some tips:
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Listen actively and attentively to what they say.
Express your feelings and thoughts honestly and respectfully.
Show interest and curiosity in their lives.
Give compliments and appreciation regularly.
Help them with their problems and challenges.
Celebrate their successes and achievements.
Rule 3: Love is a verb, not a noun
The third rule of love is to love is a verb, not a noun. This means showing your love through actions and words, not just feelings and thoughts. It also means being consistent and reliable in your behavior, not just sporadic and unpredictable. When you love is a verb, not a noun, you demonstrate your commitment and loyalty to your partner. You also make them feel valued and appreciated. How can you show your love through actions and words? Here are some tips: - Spend quality time with them and give them your undivided attention. - Do small acts of service and kindness for them, such as making them breakfast or doing the dishes. - Surprise them with thoughtful gifts or gestures, such as flowers or a handwritten note. - Hug them, kiss them, and cuddle them often and sincerely. - Say "I love you" and mean it. Rule 4: Love is a choice, not a feeling
The fourth rule of love is to love is a choice, not a feeling. This means deciding to love your partner every day, even when you don't feel like it. It also means working on your relationship and overcoming challenges, instead of giving up or running away. When you love is a choice, not a feeling, you strengthen your bond and deepen your intimacy. You also grow as a person and as a couple.
How can you commit to your partner and overcome challenges? Here are some tips:
Communicate openly and honestly about your needs, expectations, and concerns.
Compromise and negotiate when you have disagreements or conflicts.
Respect and trust each other's opinions, decisions, and actions.
Support and encourage each other's dreams and passions.
Apologize and forgive when you hurt or disappoint each other.
Rule 5: Love is a journey, not a destination
The fifth rule of love is to love is a journey, not a destination. This means enjoying the present moment and the process of loving, instead of focusing on the future or the outcome. It also means being flexible and adaptable to changes and transitions, instead of being rigid and resistant. When you love is a journey, not a destination, you experience more joy and gratitude in your relationship. You also discover new things about yourself and your partner.
How can you grow together and enjoy the process? Here are some tips:
Be curious and adventurous. Try new things and explore new places together.
Be playful and fun. Laugh together and have a sense of humor.
Be spontaneous and creative. Break the routine and do something unexpected.
Be mindful and attentive. Notice the small details and appreciate the little things.
Be romantic and passionate. Keep the spark alive and express your desire.
Rule 6: Love is a gift, not a transaction
The sixth rule of love is to love is a gift, not a transaction. This means giving and receiving love without expectations or conditions, instead of keeping score or making demands. It also means being generous and grateful for what you have, instead of being stingy or greedy for what you want. When you love is a gift, not a transaction, you create more abundance and harmony in your relationship. You also inspire others to do the same.
How can you give and receive love without expectations or conditions? Here are some tips:
Give without expecting anything in return. Do it because you want to, not because you have to.
Receive without feeling guilty or obligated. Accept it because you deserve it, not because you owe it.
Don't keep track of who does what or who gives what. Focus on the quality, not the quantity.
Don't make assumptions or judgments about what the other person wants or needs. Ask them directly or listen carefully.
Don't manipulate or coerce the other person to do what you want or need. Respect their choices and preferences.
Rule 7: Love is a teacher, not a student
The seventh rule of love is to love is a teacher, not a student. This means learning from your mistakes and improving your relationship, instead of repeating them or blaming them on others. It also means being open-minded and willing to change, instead of being closed-minded and stubborn. When you love is a teacher, not a student, you become more wise and mature in your relationship. You also help each other grow as individuals.
How can you learn from your mistakes and improve your relationship? Here are some tips:
Acknowledge your faults and weaknesses. Don't deny or hide them.
Take responsibility for your actions and consequences. Don't make excuses or shift blame.
Seek feedback and advice from others. Don't isolate yourself or ignore them.
Make amends and correct your behavior. Don't repeat the same mistakes or habits.
Seek new knowledge and skills and apply them. Don't stagnate or resist them.
Rule 8: Love is a force, not a form
The eighth and final rule of love is to love is a force, not a form. This means connecting with the universal energy of love and spreading it to the world, instead of limiting it to a specific person or situation. It also means transcending the physical and material aspects of love, and embracing the spiritual and eternal ones. When you love is a force, not a form, you experience more peace and bliss in your relationship. You also make the world a better place.
How can you connect with the universal energy of love and spread it to the world? Here are some tips:
Meditate and pray regularly. Connect with your inner self and higher power.
Practice mindfulness and awareness. Be present and attentive to the moment.
Express gratitude and appreciation. Be thankful for what you have and who you are.
Forgive and let go. Release any anger, resentment, or bitterness.
Serve and contribute. Help others in need and make a positive difference.
Conclusion: How to apply the 8 rules of love in your life
Love is not something that happens to you, but something that you create and cultivate. By following the 8 rules of love, you can find it, keep it, and let it go when necessary. You can also enjoy more happiness, fulfillment, and growth in your relationship and in your life.
The 8 rules of love are simple but powerful. They are based on the wisdom of Jay Shetty, who learned them from his experience as a monk and as a coach. They are also supported by scientific research and evidence. They are not only applicable to romantic love, but also to any kind of love, such as friendship, family, or self-love.
If you want to learn more about the 8 rules of love and how to apply them in your life, you can check out Jay Shetty's book Think Like a Monk, or his podcast On Purpose. You can also visit his website or follow him on social media. He has tons of valuable content and resources that can help you transform your mind, body, and soul.
Remember, love is not a mystery or a mystery. It is a skill that you can learn and master. It is also a gift that you can give and receive. It is the most powerful force in the universe, and it is within you. All you have to do is follow the 8 rules of love and unleash it.
FAQs
Here are some common questions and answers about love:
What is the difference between love and infatuation?
Love is a deep and lasting connection that involves respect, trust, commitment, and growth. Infatuation is a shallow and temporary attraction that involves lust, obsession, fantasy, and insecurity.
How do you know if someone loves you?
You know someone loves you when they show it through their actions and words. They treat you with kindness and compassion, they support your goals and dreams, they listen to your feelings and thoughts, they express their appreciation and affection, they are loyal and faithful, they are willing to work on the relationship and overcome challenges.
How do you know if you love someone?
You know you love someone when you feel it in your heart and mind. You care about their happiness and well-being, you respect their opinions and decisions, you communicate openly and honestly, you show your gratitude and admiration, you are committed and faithful, you are willing to grow and change. How do you fall in love?
You fall in love by being open and vulnerable, by sharing your true self and accepting the other person's true self, by finding common interests and values, by spending quality time and having fun, by creating trust and intimacy, by giving and receiving support and affection.
How do you stay in love?
You stay in love by being consistent and reliable, by maintaining communication and connection, by resolving conflicts and challenges, by expressing appreciation and admiration, by keeping the romance and passion alive, by growing and evolving together.
How do you let go of love?
You let go of love by accepting the reality and the reasons, by releasing the emotions and the memories, by focusing on yourself and your goals, by seeking help and support, by finding closure and peace, by moving on and opening up to new possibilities.
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